Page 69 - October Sun Rays_Text _proof_FinalTrim

A known practical joker, President
flour to coat a rival’s sidewalk with milky out who did it, but it must have taken
designs. Unfortunately, we put the eggs in
the bottom of our paper bags. By the time
we had collected a night’s worth of candy,
the eggs had broken, soaking through the
bags and leaving a trail of raw eggs and
precious candy in our wake. That tragic
night, you could say we’d both earned and
lost our “just desserts!”
Perhaps life back on the farm offered more
opportunities to envision and execute
complicated tricks. Dad declared that
one year, the biggest group prank pulled
involved absconding with farm equipment
and using the machinery to block the
doors of their one room schoolhouse. Over
thirty combines, tractors, bailers and hay
rakes were maneuvered under cover of
darkness, ensuring kids would be able
to sleep in on the day after Halloween as
adults removed the equipment.
I asked him if he had a favorite prank
and he quickly remembered one incident
at school. His school building was about
30 feet wide and 20 feet long with a
single aisle down the middle leading
from the front door to the back door. One
Halloween, the front door opened but
no one there. Suddenly, a black bowling
ball came rolling right down the center
aisle. Everyone was so shocked that they
stopped and stared as the bowling ball
spiraled over the wooden floor toward
the back door. Expecting the worst, kids
covered their ears. But just before the
ball smashed through the back door it
mysteriously swung open, allowing the
ball to roll out as the door closed behind
it. To this day, no one has ever figured
ONLINE: SCTEXAS.ORG
tremendous practice to get the timing
just right.
I asked dad, “Who really did all these
pranks? Was it you or your friends?”
He said no. I asked if the girls had
participated and Dad swiftly replied, “No,
they all stayed at home.” Exasperated, I
said, “Surely you must know someone who
did all these things.” Dad looked off in
the distance before finally saying, “Well,
I think Warney was involved.”
Ah, there it was - the only exclusion to
the prank omertà: it wasn’t a confession
if you blamed an innocent person. In my
dad’s case, that person was Warney, his
expendable baby brother! Even though
over 70 years had passed, I still wasn’t
going to get a straightforward prank
confession from my dad. The unspoken
promise to never confess really is as
strong as the Mafia pledge not to help
the authorities by naming names.
Dad asked me if I’d ever pulled any
Halloween pranks. I was feeling sheepish
for selling out over a bag of Butterfingers me into the long American tradition of
when I finally remembered one glorious
prank from my youth. During the early
’70s our junior high school had hired a
hip, young band director who drove a
convertible British MG sports coupe. If
you lived in Houston 50 years ago, you
probably know that seeing a British sports
car was about as rare as a seeing a two-
headed jackalope. The vehicle became a
magnet for adolescent boys.
Eventually, kids wanted to know how
light the car really was. It didn’t take
long before they discovered that, with a
Lyndon B. Johnson was also a car
enthusiast. Among his several vehicles
was a light blue Amphicar - a two door
passenger vehicle that doubled as a
speed boat. When visitors came to his
Stonewall, Texas ranch, the President
enjoyed driving his guests around
the property before barreling the
car into a lake as he screamed about
malfunctioning brakes.
few dozen hands, they could actually lift
and move it around the parking lot. The
band director didn’t seem to notice when
his car was shifted to slightly different
parking spaces so, on Halloween, a plan
was hatched. The strongest junior high
boys lifted the MG up over the curb,
up a couple of steps and finally to the
entrance of the band building, which had
an exterior vestibule about 15 feet wide.
Somehow, they slowly maneuvered the
MG sideways into the brick entryway until
only one-foot clearance remained around
the car. When the bell for the next class
rang, everyone scattered. No one looked
back and no one ever told the principal
who was involved.
Dad was impressed. After a chuckle
he asked, “So who was involved? You
and your friends?” I took a moment to
recollect almost 50 years ago and said,
“No.” Undeterred, Dad asked, “So who did
do it?” I paused, looked away and replied,
“Well, I think Richard was involved,”
invoking the name of my younger brother.
Dad smiled, and I knew I’d passed the
test. I felt my dad had finally accepted
pranks and hoaxes by both performing
a prank and not disclosing the culprits. I
didn’t want to lose that brief moment of
his acceptance, but the truth was: Richard
really did do it. Honestly!
If you have a prank from yesteryear that
you or your “younger brother” (or sister)
participated in, share it with Sun Rays
and they will post it on the Sun City Texas
Facebook page. Stories will be accepted
through the end of October.
O C TO B E R 2 0 1 6 SUNRAYS | 67